I just want this to end....

Or should I say I just wanted to start all over again. Im sick and tired of being alone. Yes, I know, I should be grateful always because my friends are around and they never let a second left for me to feel miserable. I just cant believe that Im still waiting for that impossible thing to happen AGAIN. I took it for granted. And so Im all messed up and Ive nothing to do but to blame myself. I just want this f****** difficulties to end.